Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Why am I so wanting to suck a penis?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why do guys on dating apps often just first message "hey" or "hey how are you" instead of being more creative and unique? How do they think being a copycat will stand out?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why can’t conservatives accept the fact that they are stupid?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Why do so many people suddenly think it's acceptable to continue to live with their parents into adulthood?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Why aren't F1 cars popular on the street?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I just cannot wake up early, even if I sleep on time. What should I do?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Have you ever followed through being bi-curious?

I see through liars

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

How do you explain the involvement of a mainland Chinese visitor, her local relative, and a 65-year-old friend of the latter in the suspected money laundering case seized by Hong Kong police?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have a reading level above third grade

Why does my ex boyfriend do this?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy bullshit

Why are people so rude to debt collector’s? I am one and I am so tired of being mistreated. We are under paid and then have to deal with the most ungrateful, and disrespectful people. We aren’t customer service. Don’t get mad at us because YOU owe.

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Can I see some saggy tit pics and huge areolas pics?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

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authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I actually pay taxes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

With so much evidence supporting the flat Earth theory, why aren't more resources dedicated to studying it?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

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I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t cotton to rapists

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can count

I can read

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup